Ah, the illusory idea of work and life balance. Most of us are so far removed from living a balanced life that we don’t even think it’s possible. How could we, when it’s so rare and we never see it. Work life balance seems like it’s one of those “urban legends”, you know – a friend of a friend has this uncle who knows this guy who seems to live a balanced life.
What’s really funny to me is that I meet people who say that they do have balance, but they have no time. I’ve actually heard that said in the same sentence before. I only am so bold because it “takes one to know one.” You see, most of my life I have had no “balance” to speak of. I took quite an interest, as this was something I know I’m here to learn specifically. I decided to use the knowledge of this journey and become a work life balance coach. Not only to continue learning myself, but to be able to bring to light something that human beings desperately crave, including me: a life that feels whole, complete, and fulfilling.
Each person is different, and I know that we respond to different methods. I will share some here that I know has worked for me and some others. Try them on for size and feel what fits you.
1. Get Some Clarity
This is the biggie. When we have an underlying belief that prevents us from becoming more balanced, such as “I must work hard so I can have money and be worthy of love”, then there’s a lot you don’t know about yourself – only because you’re not looking. Balance is about having the four areas of your life present and accounted for: Self, Work, Family, and Friends. If you don’t know what you want in all areas, how can you possibly have it? Start asking questions. Write it down – what do I want? What is important to me? What turns me on? What do I love to do? GREAT place to start.
2. Unveil Those Limiting Beliefs
Did I say clarity was the biggie? Well, this one’s a biggie too. If you don’t think it’s possible to have a whole, complete, and fulfilling life – then there’s no way you can ever have it. Or, if you believe that you don’t deserve it. I don’t know a single person who doesn’t have forty million limiting beliefs. Most of them given to us by society, well meaning parents, and the media. There’s so many methods for working with beliefs. Awareness of what you currently believe is where it starts, so do that now. Go back to #1 and start asking those questions. When you do, watch as your beliefs magically flow to the surface. There’s thousands of methods for changing beliefs: cognitive behavior therapy, NLP, EFT, Byron Katie’s “the work”, affirmations, coaching, the list goes on and on. Check in with yourself and see what’s right for you.
3. Say NO
Most of our lives we’ve heard how it’s not nice to say no. It’s hurts people’s feelings. In the meantime, we give ourselves the short end of the stick. We over commit and burn out. This is a huge thing you can practice immediately. Over the next 5 days, I invite you to say no to something in your life that isn’t working. By saying no, you can make room in your life for all those things that you really love.
Balance is a process, a journey if you will. Your idea of balance will change all the time, so try not to get to attached to any specific picture. Balance is about the yin and yang. Being and doing. Work and play. Remember – SELF, work, family, and friends. They are like the wheels on a car, if one is flat you’re in for a bumpy ride. Take care, be well, and don’t forget to have fun!